How should a Christian deal with serious moral problems in society? In our increasingly polarized and strident world, lashing out at those who disagree with us is becoming more and more common, and we all too often combine our attacks on ideas with those who hold them, accusing our opponents of the worst possible motives.

The problem that Paul faced in this letter was slavery. Now, because ancient slavery was not based on one’s race, it was often a temporary status. Slaves could purchase their freedom, and some former slaves became quite prominent members of society – in fact, the Felix who imprisoned and interrogated Paul had once been enslaved to the Emperor Claudius’ mother Antonia (Acts 23 and 24).

But when Paul met Onesimus, who had somehow escaped from his slavery to Philemon, and when Onesimus became a Christian through Paul’s preaching (v. 10), Paul had a choice to make. He could command Philemon to recognize Onesimus’ freedom (v. 8). But instead, he chose to appeal to Philemon to do the right thing – and he made this appeal because of his love (v. 9).

Now, Paul obviously loved Onesimus, calling him his child, and saying that when he sent him back to Philemon, he was sending his very heart along with him (vv. 10 and 12). But Paul also loved Philemon enough to allow him the blessing of doing the right thing, not through compulsion, but by his own free will (v. 14). Paul thus wanted Philemon to set Onesimus so that he could continue to take care of Paul while he was in prison. Thus, all three men could reap the benefits of Onesimus’ newfound faith in Christ.

And maybe Paul’s approach to ancient slavery can help us deal with the admittedly serious problems that increasingly divide us Christians. Maybe we should rely more on appeals to conscience and less on coercive commands. Maybe we should urge people to do the right thing of their own free will instead of trying to cancel out their voices or to bully them into submission.

And if we really love our Christian brothers and sisters, both those whom we consider to be in the wrong and those whom we consider to be victims, such a generous sort of spirit will be possible for us. After all, Christ has forgiven all who trust in Him at the cost of His own blood. May we learn to love one another in the same way that He has loved us.

Philemon (ESV)

Paul, a prisoner for Christ Jesus, and Timothy our brother, To Philemon our beloved fellow worker
2 and Apphia our sister and Archippus our fellow soldier, and the church in your house:
3 Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.
4 I thank my God always when I remember you in my prayers,
5 because I hear of your love and of the faith that you have toward the Lord Jesus and for all the saints,
6 and I pray that the sharing of your faith may become effective for the full knowledge of every good thing that is in us for the sake of Christ.
7 For I have derived much joy and comfort from your love, my brother, because the hearts of the saints have been refreshed through you.
8 Accordingly, though I am bold enough in Christ to command you to do what is required,
9 yet for love’s sake I prefer to appeal to you– I, Paul, an old man and now a prisoner also for Christ Jesus–
10 I appeal to you for my child, Onesimus, whose father I became in my imprisonment.
11 (Formerly he was useless to you, but now he is indeed useful to you and to me.)
12 I am sending him back to you, sending my very heart.
13 I would have been glad to keep him with me, in order that he might serve me on your behalf during my imprisonment for the gospel,
14 but I preferred to do nothing without your consent in order that your goodness might not be by compulsion but of your own accord.
15 For this perhaps is why he was parted from you for a while, that you might have him back forever,
16 no longer as a bondservant but more than a bondservant, as a beloved brother– especially to me, but how much more to you, both in the flesh and in the Lord.
17 So if you consider me your partner, receive him as you would receive me.
18 If he has wronged you at all, or owes you anything, charge that to my account.
19 I, Paul, write this with my own hand: I will repay it– to say nothing of your owing me even your own self.
20 Yes, brother, I want some benefit from you in the Lord. Refresh my heart in Christ.
21 Confident of your obedience, I write to you, knowing that you will do even more than I say.
22 At the same time, prepare a guest room for me, for I am hoping that through your prayers I will be graciously given to you.
23 Epaphras, my fellow prisoner in Christ Jesus, sends greetings to you,
24 and so do Mark, Aristarchus, Demas, and Luke, my fellow workers.
25 The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ be with your spirit.