How should a Christian deal with serious moral problems in society? In our increasingly polarized and strident world, lashing out at those who disagree with us is becoming more and more common, and we all too often combine our attacks on ideas with those who hold them, accusing our opponents of the worst possible motives.

The problem that Paul faced in this letter was slavery. Now, because ancient slavery was not based on one’s race, it was often a temporary status. Slaves could purchase their freedom, and some former slaves became quite prominent members of society – in fact, the Felix who imprisoned and interrogated Paul had once been enslaved to the Emperor Claudius’ mother Antonia (Acts 23 and 24).

But when Paul met Onesimus, who had somehow escaped from his slavery to Philemon, and when Onesimus became a Christian through Paul’s preaching (v. 10), Paul had a choice to make. He could have commanded Philemon to recognize Onesimus’ freedom (v. 8). But instead, Paul chose to appeal to Philemon to do the right thing: and he made this appeal because of his love (v. 9).

Now, Paul obviously loved Onesimus, calling him his child, and saying that when he sent him back to Philemon, he was sending his very heart along with him (vv. 10 and 12). But Paul also loved Philemon enough to allow him the blessing of doing the right thing, not through compulsion, but by his own free will (v. 14). Paul thus wanted Philemon to choose to set Onesimus free so that Onesimus could continue to take care of Paul while he was in prison. Thus, all three men could reap the benefits of Onesimus’ newfound faith in Christ.

And maybe Paul’s approach to ancient slavery can help us deal with the admittedly serious problems that increasingly divide us modern Christians. Maybe we should rely more on appeals to conscience and less on coercive commands. Maybe we should urge people to do the right thing of their own free will instead of trying to cancel out their voices or to bully them into submission.

And if we really love our Christian brothers and sisters, both those whom we consider to be in the wrong and those whom we consider to be victims, such a generous sort of spirit will be possible for us. After all, Christ has forgiven all who trust in Him at the cost of His own blood. May we learn to love one another in the same way that He has loved us.

Philemon (NASB)

Paul, a prisoner of Christ Jesus, and Timothy our brother, to Philemon our beloved brother and fellow worker,
2 and to Apphia our sister, and to Archippus our fellow soldier, and to the church in your house:
3 Grace to you and peace from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ.
4 I thank my God always, making mention of you in my prayers,
5 because I hear of your love, and of the faith which you have toward the Lord Jesus, and toward all the saints;
6 and I pray that the fellowship of your faith may become effective through the knowledge of every good thing which is in you for Christ’s sake.
7 For I have come to have much joy and comfort in your love, because the hearts of the saints have been refreshed through you, brother.
8 Therefore, though I have enough confidence in Christ to order you to do that which is proper,
9 yet for love’s sake I rather appeal to you– since I am such a person as Paul, the aged, and now also a prisoner of Christ Jesus–
10 I appeal to you for my child, whom I have begotten in my imprisonment, Onesimus,
11 who formerly was useless to you, but now is useful both to you and to me.
12 And I have sent him back to you in person, that is, sending my very heart,
13 whom I wished to keep with me, that in your behalf he might minister to me in my imprisonment for the gospel;
14 but without your consent I did not want to do anything, that your goodness should not be as it were by compulsion, but of your own free will.
15 For perhaps he was for this reason parted from you for a while, that you should have him back forever,
16 no longer as a slave, but more than a slave, a beloved brother, especially to me, but how much more to you, both in the flesh and in the Lord.
17 If then you regard me a partner, accept him as you would me.
18 But if he has wronged you in any way, or owes you anything, charge that to my account;
19 I, Paul, am writing this with my own hand, I will repay it (lest I should mention to you that you owe to me even your own self as well).
20 Yes, brother, let me benefit from you in the Lord; refresh my heart in Christ.
21 Having confidence in your obedience, I write to you, since I know that you will do even more than what I say.
22 And at the same time also prepare me a lodging; for I hope that through your prayers I shall be given to you.
23 Epaphras, my fellow prisoner in Christ Jesus, greets you,
24 as do Mark, Aristarchus, Demas, Luke, my fellow workers.
25 The grace of the Lord Jesus Christ be with your spirit.